Dragon Con 2009
It’s come to my attention that this whole fucking picture thing fucking sucks, and since tumblr is really only good for posting LOLCATZ, you may not be able to properly view a media intensive post such as this one. Sorry. I’ll be moving soon.Some cities are known for St. Patrick’s Day. Others are known for New Year’s Eve. One city is even known for this. But the city of Atlanta shines for one holiday usually reserved for barbecues: Labor Day. Yes, Atlanta does Labor Day weekend up right, hosting a number of incredible events. From the Decatur Book Festival, to Starlight Six’s Drive-Invasion, to a number of kick-off football games, Atlanta has something for everyone. But of course, for those of us who like to have a REALLY good time, there’s only one thing to do with your Labor Day weekend: Dragon*Con. And 2009’s Dragon*Con was, as Plato put it, “the shit.”
I carpooled downtown with my dear friend Becca, courtesy of her mom, where we were dumped outside the Hyatt to drop off goodies with her boyfriend and then head off to registration. Becca didn’t preorder her ticket so the two of us were separated as I headed off to the Ticketmaster line. After a short wait, I had a badge. Of course, I was as glib as always filling out the “Nickname” field, so I ended up with this rad badge:
After that, it was off to Adult Swim’s Dragon Panel. For those of you out of the loop, the Dragon Panel is a panel in which different Adult Swim staffers dress up like dragons, show clips from upcoming Adult Swim works, field questions about dragons, and make fun of the people asking questions about dragons. It was really good this year, as opposed to last year’s schlock fest. I’m really impressed with how authentically entertaining it was this year, due in no small part to the efforts of my dear friend, Eddie “Two Drink Minimum” Ray.
After that, I met back up with Becca, and it was costume time. My mom and I worked tirelessly on my costume, Max from “Where the Wild Things Are” or, more specifically, the “Where the Wild Things Are” movie. Behold.
You can’t tell, but this costume was hottt. No really, in addition to the number of pictures people were taking, I was sweating my balls off in this. This picture kind of does it justice. This thing will be waaaay more comfortable come October 31st, but it still ruled. People stopped me every fifty feet to take my picture. I felt like Lindsay Lohan but with not as much exposed vagina. Plus, whenever I carried around my bottle of gin and juice, I looked like Little Jon!
Lots of people loved the costume as you can imagine. Plus it made every picture I took with people who were in costume look even stranger as, often, the juxtaposition of the two characters didn’t make any sense in the slightest.
Another time, I took this picture with one of the little guys from the upcoming movie “9” and we were mobbed by a bunch of losers screaming “Holy shit they’re both coming out in the fall.” Real cool, guys. We headed to the costume contest (best costume here, complete with functioning pneumatic drill) and did some partying that night, but I had to get home relatively early. After all, I had something important to do that morning…
THE DRAGON CON PARADE!!!!!!!
Yup, I got to Woodruff Park at 9 in the morning to take my part in the Young Adult Literature section of the best parade in Atlanta. Young Adult Literature is a pretty broad term that ensured I would be sandwiched between the likes of Coraline and the Other Mother, the Johnny Depp Mad Hatter, about forty Harry Potter characters, and two Twihards dressed up like unrecognizable vampire sluts. I tried my best to stay in character the whole time, howling and skipping for the first few blocks, but eventually the heat of the day took its toll on me and I had to mellow out.
(Photo by Roger Chang, click it for a higher res version)
Ah yes, the breathing power of microsuede. After I got rehydrated from all that, I headed up to Mike and Becca’s room for a quick change and headed BACK downstairs to get ready for the Venture Brother’s panel. This is the one panel I never want to miss because VB fans make the best costumes.
Plus they’re always obscure so no one knows what they are. Can you name them? I met up with Josh and Geoff and Joshua and Mikey (confusing I know) as we filed in. I got to sit front row this year (courtesy of my good friend Eddie Ray) and was so close to the show’s creators, Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer, I could practically smell the residual tobacco. They were funny as ever, fielding one great question RE: Anne Frank vs. Helen Keller, and they premiered the first 12 minutes of the fourth season premiere, which is going to be incredible.
After that, we meandered from place to place, eventually getting suited back up and heading out to a round of parties.
Yes, Geoff stole my old Halloween costume. The few people who knew what he was pooped their pants out of excitement.
One of these parties was so crowded, we were told not to even bother waiting in line. It was a Battlestar Galactica party. Nothing makes you feel cooler than getting turned away from a Battlestar Galactica party. We did some other parties, and eventually went home for some shut-eye, but not before this adorableness happened.
Sunday was a slower day, starting later and resulting in a few robot battles and some delicious food at the mall. Eventually, we suited back up and headed to the Mad Scientists’ Ball. After sitting through the world’s shittiest opening act, the band Arc Attack came out and did this. Incredible conceptually but emceed by one of the most annoying people in the planet. We stayed around for a few songs but left pretty soon after that. We went out in search of more entertainment, which meant more drinking, and writing my website on some girl in permanent marker. We’ll see how that worked out. The night went late, eventually culminating in this photo I told the subject would make profile pic status, a vow I’ve definitely rescinded. We partied until eight in the morning, witnessing this one hickey-covered pirate try to hit on a bunch of girls we with whom we were chatting and then making out with another guy against a column on the patio as they gave each other mutual down-the-pants hand jobs. Classy, Dragon*Con!
The night culminated at Waffle House, which was a blessing as it turned out to be Free Waffle Day. Honestly, Labor Day rules. Hopefully, we’ll have our own room next year, but if not, it’ll still be fun.
